Dear everyone with eyes,

As some of you may know, I spent the last six months of 2010 working as a staff writer on a new NBC sitcom, Perfect Couples. Unlike most of the things that I’ve worked on during my career in television, I’m actually proud of my involvement with the show. Which is why I’m doing my part to promote the series premiere this Thursday, January 20th at 8:30 on NBC.

If audiences enjoy watching it half as much as I enjoyed working on it, we’ll be golden. So, if you like TV, laughing, and/or making sure my unborn child has diapers and food and stuff…maybe check it out?

On this episode, we talk about the cinematic mind-fuck that is Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans. the effect that Wesley Snipes has on the panties of older ladies, and The Dancing Plague of 1518.

Go get it, here!

It’s been a while since I felt the need to shake things up on my top 5 white girls list. Like any self-respecting angry populist, Ms. Warren has been on my radar for some time now.  After her appearance on The Daily Show, I wanted her to make me some hot cocoa and further explain how she was going to make those bad men pay for locking me and my hypothetical children into a lifetime of wage slavery at the hands of Capital One, Citibank, etc. After reading this piece in the latest Rolling Stone, and this Q & A on CounterPunch, I knew it was time to give her a spot.

Also, it will now be known as the Top 5 White Women list.  Much classier; especially given the new tilt of the list towards more serious issues.  And now, the new list.

1. Bjork – Having said that, there is very little that I take as seriously as music.
2. Amy Goodman – The more I read, the more documentaries I watch, the more conversations I have with interesting people at random parties and events, the more I find  myself saying or thinking, “I know about that because of Amy Goodman.”  Either through her work on Democracy Now or her talks and books, I can’t think of any single person other than Noam Chomsky who has introduced me to so many national and global news stories, socio-political issues, amazing thinkers and activists, and exposed the failings and lies of so many scoundrels and scalawags.
3. Elizabeth Warren – It’s that serious.  Getting Wall Street under control should be one of the highest priorities of every global citizen.
4. Shiela Kuehl – Former California State Senator who introduced SB 840; legislation that would establish a state single payer health care system.  Twice, the bill passed both houses of the legislature only to be vetoed by The Governator.  Last year, Senator Mark Leno re-introduced “The California Universal Healthcare Act.” SB 810, as it is now called, was passed by the Senate in January.  Also, Kuehl played Zelda on The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis.
5. Ruth Jones – Co-creator, co-writer and co-star of the BBC sitcom Gavin & Stacey.  My favorite performer on one of my favorite shows of recent years.  The accents can be a bit tough to penetrate, but if you can figure out what they’re saying on The Wire or in any Guy Ritchie film, you’ll be fine.

And that’s what’s occurring.

To honor her, I’m going to buy my wife a purple duster with a high collar for her birthday. According to Wikipedia, that’s Donny Hathaway singing the opening theme. No wonder that shit swings like it does.

Vexing for multiple reasons. As the title suggests, my mind immediately goes to the struggling MCs in the greater Winston-Salem, NC area. You’re relaxing on the couch after a long, hard day of real keeping. You turn on the news and see this shit. Really, WXII? You couldn’t at least give Jenny some money out of petty cash to pay for a ghost writer? But white people making awful hip-hop related decisions is neither new nor shocking. What I’m genuinely surprised by is just how bad she is. It’s 2009. You’d think that by now the words, sounds, and affectations of hip-hop would have permeated white culture enough for this chick to be able to cobble together some rudimentary lyrics. It’s like she doesn’t even understand the basic concept of a rhyme scheme.

I blame Fergie.

Since I’ve been doing stand-up almost as long as we’ve been together, the wife has seen more than her fair share of comedians.  As you might expect, she’s a bit jaded.  Someone who always manages to brighten her day is the highly original Maria Bamford.  Her act is part stand-up, part one-woman show, and part multiple-personality disorder.  She’s the comedy co-chair of the long-running show What’s Up, Tiger Lily.

This Monday, in honor of the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., I will be intergrating the fuck out of Tiger Lily.  If you have no money, but a desire to see a kick-ass comedy show with real life teevee personalities like the aformentioned Ms. Bamford and Mary Lynn Rajskub (24, Little Miss Sunshine) come on down and let’s pour some out for the brother who isn’t here.